When your life changes…

When you’re in a couple for a long time you make Plans, and oh such ‘Plans’. You talk about moving in together, marriage, kids, mortgages, loans. All that crap comes up at some point within a 6 year relationship. Then things happen which throw those plans back for another 3 years, and leaves you wondering when you’re ever going to be able to afford to get married and have kids. A dear friend of mine just dumped her boyfriend, and is left wondering ‘what now’. Of course, the obvious thing to remind her is that her life was not entirely tied up in that bloke. And then to apply ice cream, chocolate, comedy films and general being-there-for-her.

For myself? My partner of, um 6 years (I had to stop to count) has decided that his dead end career needs a change. Which does rob us of a substantial amount of money for the next 3 years, despite the financial aid he will receive in his chosen profession. I have trouble curbing my spending, generally when I’m under stress or worried I will go out and spend. I can’t do that now, and I will again be the major bread winner for a long time while he retrains. Kids? Ha! Mortgage? GTFO. No more white picket fence for another 4 years at least.

However postponing having a family and a secure home was going to happen anyway until the property market hits it’s lowest. It gives us time to save, time to learn to budget (ha) and so on. Until now, where that money will need to go to pay off our loan and to help us through the difficult years ahead while he pursues being a student again. I really hope he can do it. it has thrown me for a loop, and I’m so proud of him for standing up and saying that he doesn’t want his current job. It’s easy for him, but in the long run the career won’t make him happy. Hopefully the change will.


~ by Pewter on August 12, 2008.

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